I was thirteen when I knew I am going to be bald in my twenties.
It was a Sunday evening and I was sitting in the living room watching TV. My dad was getting ready for his evening walk in the park he usually meets his friends and talks about politics. I saw my dad get ready, and for the first time, I realized that he is bald. Not that I didn’t know it before, but that was the first time I realized I might become bald like him in my mid or late twenties. I also realized why my grandad was wearing a cap in the photo that hung in our living room for several years.
The thought of going bald was scary, but I started to accept the fact from a very young age. That had helped me a great deal in my twenties when I started losing my hair. I did not feel ashamed or feel bad about myself. I started to embrace the condition and made peace with it. But, that is not the case with other men who are going through or went through a similar situation. They’re often depressed and resort to drugs and drinking to cope up with the stress.
Baldness and Depression
According to an article published in the Telegraph, more than a quarter of men under the age 35 turn to drink and drugs due to hair loss. In a survey conducted by ASDA pharmacy, 41% of men said that they can cope up with losing their home or losing vision in one of their eyes than losing hair. Many reported that hair loss has had a huge impact on their social and romantic lives. And, men globally spend about $3.5 billion every year hoping to reverse hair loss.
Hair loss is really depressing and it puts those affected in a great deal of emotional stress. They start to feel less confident about themselves and often come to the conclusion that their social and romantic life is doomed. But, with the right support system and mental preparedness, you can make peace with it.
Confidence is the key
Even though I was prepared to handle baldness from a very young age, the actual sight of the thinning hairline and visible scalp did put me through a couple of sleepless nights. I googled about possible remedies and tried every natural recipe my neighbors and relatives had suggested. But, I never stopped going bald. That is when I realized that I should not try to control something that is beyond my reach. I understood that baldness in my case was hereditary and subjecting myself to treatments might improve the situation, but might not bring things back to normal. I decided to become the most confident bald guy out there.
And, I eventually became the most confident bald guy out there. I was not ashamed to address the fact that I was becoming bald. I did not do something to my hair or wear anything to hide it. I learned to carry myself the way I am and people around me slowly started getting it. People stopped making jokes because they knew it won’t have an effect. I was bald and proud.
Turn baldness into a trend
Like every other thing, baldness has also evolved according to the new age. When I decided to shave off my head in 2015, I was a little skeptical. But, I also did not want a lot of side hair as it made me look older than I was. So, I decided to shave off my head and have a french beard. To my surprise, it was well-received among my peers and family. Everyone around me started looking at baldness as a style than a condition. It gave me a lot of confidence and made me think “baldness isn’t such a bad thing.”
Sometimes you’ll have to change the way people are used to seeing something. You need to package things in a better way. Presenting them with something new can get their attention and sometimes even get them to follow your style. I’m not kidding! After I shaved off my head, a few others in my workplace (who had great hair) shaved off their heads to try on the look.
And, this has also been validated by research. Shaving off your head can make you look attractive.
According to a study published in 2017, bald men are considered more confident and attractive.
When researchers at The University of Pennsylvania asked students (male and female) to rate photographs of men according to attractiveness, confidence and dominance – and men who are bald, trumped in all three categories.
Things have changed
Baldness is not a deal-breaker in today’s relationships. Things have changed. Studies suggest that women find bald men masculine and attractive. So, there’s no need to be worried about your baldness being a hindrance to your love life. Always remember to be yourself, and good things will follow.
If you’re looking to go for an arranged marriage, things are still a little old-fashioned, but it has started to change. When my parents started to look for someone (yes..you heard that right), a lot of families have did not get back after seeing my picture. Even though the girls were okay with it, their parents were not really into having a bald guy as their son-in-law. But, I did not do anything. I stayed the same and looked for someone who accepts me for who I am.
My logic was, “What if I had so much hair today and I go bald in five years? What if she had married me for my great hair?!” (just a hypothetical situation. Don’t take this seriously). If I let the world know I am bald today, my potential partner would know I will stay bald for the rest of my life. If she likes me now, she’s gonna like me for the rest of our married life. No surprises there.
And, when I met my wife, she knew I am bald. But, she wanted to know the person in me. As we spoke, she liked me for being myself, and we recently completed our first anniversary. So, be yourself, and the rest will follow.
Baldness is depressing. There is no doubt. But, the key to going through it, is confidence. If you pair that with a great support system (family, friends, girlfriend, colleagues, etc.) there’s nothing like it. Think of it as a new chapter in your life. A chapter from where you’re gonna look more confident, masculine, sexy, and badass for the rest of your life.
If you’re feeling low or depressed, feel free to talk to your close friends and family. Do not hesitate. Talk to other bald men. Or, feel free to send me an email. I am always here to listen.